Serving as the perfect counterpart to the Fuck Yeah Sonic the Comic comes A Moment of Archie Sonic.

“Even if you love Archie Sonic, sometimes things are just plain damn wrong,” the blog warns us ahead of time. Oh, how right they are. Even if you have been a devout follower of the series it is hard to argue that the art has been stellar, or every line is Pulitzer prize material. And I mean, with images like this…

…so easy to use, no wonder its number one!

Clearly, we need to find something that only we in Europe (if I’m honest, more specifically the UK, but work with me here) really had, in order to sustain us until Friday finally rolls around (pun totally intended). Ladies and gentlemen, I present the first part of Sonic the Comic‘s finest hour: the adaptation of Sonic the Hedgehog 3.

Our tale of 2 cartridges begins in the first of StC’s poster mags – putting the very first appearance of a hotly-awaited character into the first issue of a spin-off of your comic as a cynical marketing ploy to sell more issues? Surely not! But no, Red’s here, only – he’s not really that red. Looking pretty fancy there, Knuckles! Been out in the sun a bit too long? In reality this is likely just to be because at this point only Sonic 3 was out, never mind S&K even being announced, & we hadn’t seen a non-bodged-so-as-to-not-clash-with-Sonic’s-palette Knuckles, so I guess we can give them a pass on this one. Whilst our issue’s hero stands looking… let’s face it, rather creepily down at the land below, he’s completely neglecting to look overhead, where he spins around to see a giant burning fireball zoom overhead and crash into the ground in the far distance, without the island so much as twitching (we’ll get into why this is an oddity in a minute). Mentioning one of the brand-new Sonic 3 zones, Knuckles gets into a “Zoom Tube” (the ones from Lava Reef Zone are dotted all over the island in this reality, which I guess makes sense) and in no time at all is over in the snowy wasteland, inspecting an oddly curved metallic device – with an opening hatch, that a small robot flies out of. Apparently rather than Icecap Zone, Knuckles has ended up on Hoth!

The Viper probe explains that it is actually a living being, trapped somewhere inside the crashed wreckage, and that Knuckles should follow the camera to him. Knuckles asks if he is one of his people (we’ll get back to them later), but the camera explains that he is merely a “humble inventor” (and if you haven’t guessed where this is going yet, slap yourself over the head with a copy of Mean Bean Machine right now, please). Following the camera down the hole, Knuckles wanders a maze of wrecked metallic corridors as the camera explains that this is his space satellite, until that morning harmlessly orbiting Mobius. The main engines suddenly gave out, forcing him to crash-land back on the planet’s surface. Knuckles points out this isn’t the surface, it’s the Floating Island, which gives the camera somewhat of a shock.

You can almost hear the glee in Robotnik‘s voice, can’t you? Knuckles continues to spill the beans about everything as the two of them continue along. Fortunately before Knuckles can get into any depth about just what he does all by himself on the Floating Island, he finally reaches a room in the middle of the doomed ship. Robotnik (for it IS he, shock) greets Knuckles and says it’s fortunate that he came along, as the camera pans to reveal:

Oh, look, he’s fallen, and can’t get up. Build a better escape mechanism next time, you were very lucky the most gullible creature in the entire franchise saw you come down in your crashing Death Egg (for reference, this is the Death Egg II, apparently; not the one we saw in the first part of this little saga). With little more than just the beginnings of how Robotnik is filling Knuckles’ head with nonsense, the issue, and the intro story, ends.

–

We then cut to StC issue #33, where a squirrel in a bow-tie (Sally Acorn? The mind boggles with the possibilities) and a cravat (very Austin Powers) reminds us of the crash from the Summer Special, informing the audience that the Mobians at large think Robotnik is dead following the crash of the Death Egg. The camera then pans out to reveal that it’s in fact Amy Rose, watching the news on TV.

Porker Lewis berates Amy’s worshipping of the goggle-box when they’re supposed to be working (hey, it could be worse, Porker. Could be the furry version of Coronation Street or something), as the holographic Dr Kintobor that serves as their base’s computer tells them that Robotnik’s robots will never find the wreckage, as he doesn’t believe it landed on Mobius – he thinks it hit something else before reaching sea level, specifically the Floating Island. Johnny Lightfoot buys it, but Amy’s somewhat more sceptical, calling the others nuts for believing in an old legend.

We cut to Sonic & Tails on board the Tornado, flying through some dense cloud as Sonic complains loudly about how he can’t believe Kintobor talked them into going on a hunt for the island; until Tails spots something in the distance, causing Sonic to do his best Victor Meldrew impression as the pair fly over Marble Garden Zone.

You know, I’m severely doubting just how hard it is to see this bloody huge ton of floating rock. Putting aside the giant hole in the clouds here that those mountains could clearly see the island through (especially with a decent pair of binoculars or something), does Mobius never get any completely clear days? Or do the clouds themselves just hang around the island permanently, which itself raises a whole ton of questions about them (a) never ever dissipating, only moving in a group, and (b) just what’s causing the giant fluffy pile of precipitation to keep the flying rubble pile permanently shrouded.

You’ll be unsurprised to hear that not one of these vital questions is answered, while Sonic berates Tails after asking him to contact Porker and let the others know they found the island. Tails does so, as Porker wishes the pair luck. We then cut back to the base momentarily as the other members of the freedom fighters discuss this exciting piece of news: oh, wait, no, my mistake. They’re just mocking Amy.

Looks like Sonic’s dickishness is rubbing off somewhat on Johnny & Porker, no? Even Kintobor is grinning. For her part, all Amy can do is scowl at Porker and make a rather weak comeback, while no doubt thinking about bacon & rabbit pie. Cutting back to the plot, Sonic gazes at a statue, noting that just because they’ve found the island doesn’t mean that Robotnik is actually on it, a valid point. Tails isn’t a fan of the statue’s face (he’s an art critic now), causing an opening that Sonic just can’t avoid, even as a projectile hurtles towards him:

Dodging the arrow and quipping that Tails can’t take a joke, Sonic runs right for the statue and spins up, with Tails quickly blurting out that he wasn’t the one who fired the thing. Sonic’s already gathered as much though, smashing right through the thing and slipping down a steep slope. One slope leads to another, and Sonic’s remark about how he actually likes falling to certain death now looks like he’s going to get what he wished for, as he flies off the end of a final slope and into thin air, wondering to the universe at large at why there’s never a two-tailed fox around when you actually need one?

Right on cue, Tails grabs hold of Sonic’s hands and steers the two of them back towards the island, though the fox says that he simply doesn’t have the strength to fly the whole distance back on to the surface of the island again. Instead, the pair steer for a tunnel opening on the side of it and hope for the best (an opening that points outwards and downwards on the island? What does Knuckles use this for, funnelling out shit from the Hydrocity latrines?) However, it doesn’t go to the surface, but a small room. Tails sighs that they aren’t back on top again, but Sonic tells him not to give up so quickly and runs point blank at a wall, smashing though it – and back outside. Sonic then spots a badnik flying through the air, a Pointdexter – and notes that Kintobor was dead on with his assumption, as this thing has to be a badnik. And as a badnik, it needs to be smashed, right?

Ooooh, that looks painful! Only a quick application of Sonic’s forcefield (oh, yeah, he’s just gained this ability suddenly. Useful!) saves the hedgehog from turning into a stylish blue pincushion at the spines of a quite petrified looking badnik, which then drifts off, severely bent out of shape.

Nice for Tails to point out the audience remark, anyway. Sonic says that he’ll tell Tails about it later, as the badnik means that Robotnik must be around here somewhere (really? They’re not exactly tied to his location. Then again, I suppose he’s not been here that long… whatever). Tails asks what they’re actually going to do if they find Robotnik, which Sonic says is a very good question – wait, you never discussed what you’re going to do if you find him? Wasn’t that the entire reason you came to the Floating Island in the first place? There’s no time to debate this however, as suddenly who should step out from behind a pillar but the fat bastard himself – and Sonic promptly charges right at him, proclaiming that this time there’s nobody to protect him. Oh, Sonic, you jinxed yourself as you said it – and he runs into Knuckles’ fist, knocking himself out. Smooth! Tails nervously prods Sonic’s head as Robotnik & his new hench-echidna look on. Cue a 2 week wait to see what Robotnik has in store for our heroes, now helpless at the fists of the “invincible” Knuckles (way to oversell your new buddy, Robotnik)!

–

Finally cutting back to the story, we see that in the last 2 weeks – pretty much nothing has happened, as Robotnik & Knuckles have conveniently stood around doing nothing until Sonic woke back up. Nice of them to do so, the fat scientist could have taken the chance to destroy Sonic by something even as simple as getting Knuckles to throw him off the edge of the island, but whatever. Sonic sits up, as Robotnik says he is glad Knuckles didn’t hit him too hard. Really? Knuckles for his part merely brags that he barely touched Sonic. Robotnik says that Sonic should just give up, as he’ll never get his hands on the Chaos Emeralds, to which Sonic rebukes that he doesn’t want to steal any – for one thing he already has some. Robotnik, turning to Knuckles, quickly tells him that he stole his Emeralds and that he’s now after Knuckles’ ones too (seems he didn’t take the chance of, you know, killing your worst enemy, to instead go with a more elaborate scheme involving Knuckles punching the crap out of Sonic. Whatever floats your boat, Doc). Robotnik then says that if “this vile creature” harnesses the power of Knuckles’ emeralds, they would all be doomed.

Knuckles being the gullible sod that he is, completely swallows Robotnik’s story and takes the opportunity to beat the hell out of Sonic again, but this time the punch only knocks him down, not out cold. Evidently his punches don’t have as much power as Sonic running into them gives them. Sonic realises at this point that Knuckles has been duped, but being the dick that he is, reasoning with Knuckles blatantly isn’t an option.

Can you imagine the relief on Tails’ face (conveniently out of shot here) on realising that Sonic now has a new favourite emotional punching bag in the shape of Knuckles here? He promptly buggers off out of the way, leaving Sonic & Knuckles to fight each other as a delighted Robotnik looks on (munching on a box of egg-flavoured popcorn, no doubt). Sonic is too fast for Knuckles to touch all of a sudden (oh, so now Sonic’s actively pissed off he puts some actual effort in? Maybe the reason he got knocked cold before wasn’t that he actually was, but that he was pretending to be, just to terrify Tails. This makes sense, on reflection). Knuckles has other ways of attacking though, as he punches the ground, shattering it and making a fault line blow Sonic off his feet (is this really a good idea when you’re on a floating rock? But I digress…)

….Charlie? I think the “wh-what?” here from Knuckles isn’t so much about getting caught up in the swirling energy vortex that then promptly throws him in the air, as it is about the rather random nickname. Does Sonic think that Knuckles is on cocaine or something? Knuckles turns his aerial excursion into a dive, tunnelling into the ground as he hits it. Sonic remarks that knuckles is good, but true to form, that he is better, following him into the hole. Robotnik meanwhile steadies his balance on the ground, musing that underground Knuckles has the advantage, and congratulating himself on convincing Knuckles that Sonic is the bad guy – a stroke of genius, on his part.

Do you really want to know, Doc? Man, the Marble Garden Zone is really becoming a wreck here, isn’t it? Maybe this is how Aquatic Ruin got formed, by two of Knuckles’ ancestors having an underground punch-up… Anyway, as it happens, the winner of the current underground duel is revealed – as Sonic, who punches Knuckles high into the air from out of a hole with a cry of “RAAAAAA!” Sonic then stands triumphant over the downed Knuckles, telling him to just give up, to which Knuckles responds that he wasn’t aware the fight had even started.

Oh just get a room, you two. However there’s no time for horribly written Sonuckles slash-fiction, as Tails flies overhead in the Tornado – seems that Sonic & Tails did have some time to debate what they were going to do if they found Robotnik, as Sonic remarks that the fox is right on cue; though he can’t resist the “for once” jab. Sonic does another Phoenix Wright pose (seems he’s quite fond of doing this, he did one against Metal Sonic as well) at Robotnik, remarking that as much as he’d love to play some more with Knuckles, he has something else to take care of – and yells to Tails to go for it.

Once again, we’re denied seeing what is probably a hilarious expression on Tails’ face, as he drops a large net from the Tornado towards Robotnik – and catches him in it! Robotnik bawls for rescue from Knuckles, to which Sonic retorts he won’t be doing anything of the sort unless he’s somehow learnt to fly – and seeing as this isn’t the OVA, Robotnik is somewhat out of luck. Knuckles replies that if he catches Sonic, Tails will bring “the good doctor” back again, but as Sonic points out, Knuckles may be “nearly” his match in a fight, but when it comes to raw speed the echidna is nowhere near Sonic; as he quickly dashes to the top of a small cliff.

“Well, we could give him some liposuction, shave his moustache off, throw rotten eggs at him, call him a lard-arse…” Actually, I’m amazed the Tornado can fly with that weight, especially as the booster engine doesn’t appear to be on the underside of it. Tails asks Sonic if he thinks he could have beaten Knuckles had he not essentially done a runner (albeit with a good reason). Sonic boasts that he was just getting warmed up, and it wouldn’t have been a problem – while secretly thinking that the fight had been very tough, and that he doesn’t think he’s seen the last of Knuckles.

How right he is.

–

Cut to two weeks later in the next issue, where some time has passed and the whole cast is ganging up on Porker Lewis for some reason. Judging by the pig’s reaction, it probably involves making a round of bacon sandwiches or something – actually, I could totally see Fleetway Sonic ordering Porker to do that. But no, as it happens, it’s just a bit of friendly interrogation of the good Doctor, who has been held in a cell under the Freedom Fighters’ base ever since getting hooked in the net. Lewis nervously greets Robotnik, who says that he slept well and that he in fact had a dream about what he was going to do to Porker when he escapes (back to bacon sandwiches again? Or maybe Robotnik’s more of a pork sausage man, who knows).

Come on, seriously. Look into those eyes. You look at the man’s face, and tell me he’s not completely ignoring everything Lewis is mumbling about while shaking in his bovver boots, and instead thinking about glistening pig-based meat products. Still trembling, Porker politely asks Robotnik (Porker’s not really got the hang of this interrogation lark, has he? I bet Sonic was water-boarding the shit out of him) to tell him something about the latest generation of badniks, to which Robotnik creepily replies there is one that might be of interest to Lewis – it’s just about the right size to contain a pig. Lewis gulps a little, but before any more Hannibal Lecter-esque interviewing can take place (seriously. Look at the bottle that’s on the floor, you can just about make out the word “chianti” on it), the room suddenly starts to shake.

Robotnik just has time to finish grumbling before grinning with glee, as Knuckles smashes out through the floor, declaring that he’s here to save Robotnik from “the evil Sonic!”  Lewis for his part tries to sound the alarm, turning and yelling for help from Sonic, but he fails to get away from the cage while doing so, leaving plenty of opportunity for Robotnik to grab hold of the pig and jam him against the cage bars. Presumably he hadn’t tried this yet already for Lewis (who’s a notorious coward) to not be keeping his distance as it is, but had instead been waiting for this all along. Bit of luck on his part he got arguably the most useless physical fighter (and this even includes Tails, folks! The one whose “Zonerunner” alter-ego basically saves the day by complete accident every time!) in position just as the escape attempt was needed.

Sonic dashes downstairs to find Robotnik & Knuckles in the cage, with Porker trapped in a headlock, and throws off a typically dickish quip. Incidentally, I take back everything I said about you in the Sonic CD arc, Amy. Porker is much easier to capture than you are. Robotnik glares at Sonic and demands the Chaos Emeralds he knows Sonic has – and to hurry about getting them before he does anything. Amy, Tails & Johnny burst in – far too late (why were they doing these interrogations singularly, anyway?!) – and Amy asks Sonic what’s going on, to which the hedgehog replies that it’s just “Porker Lewis – professional hostage, doing his usual thorough job”. Porker for his part completely ignores the insult (it has to be an automatic coping mechanism after so long around Sonic) and says that they shouldn’t worry about him, and instead don’t give Robotnik the emeralds. Will Sonic listen to this?

Of course not.

You know, Sonic, there are better ways of telling your friend that you’re not going to sacrifice him for the better good than that, but I suppose it’s asking a bit much for you to do that. Johnny doesn’t look too thrilled with the prospect of handing over the shiny chaotic gems to Robotnik, but he goes and gets them anyway. Sonic reveals that they have been keeping them in a refrigerated box to keep them stable (remember this, kids, there’s a test later!), but Robotnik doesn’t care about plot setups and just demands that Sonic stops dithering and hands them over. He then turns to Knuckles and says that he was being truthful after all – Sonic had the emeralds all along, and now they have them back they can be returned to their rightful place on the Floating Island. Apparently the fact Robotnik is still choking Porker against the cage bars isn’t enough to convince Knuckles that Robotnik is actually the villain of the piece – well, to be fair, Sonic’s not exactly a paragon of virtue, is he. However, Sonic has one last question.

OK, these 3 panels raise several points, so let’s go over them. Firstly, the issue of how Knuckles found Robotnik – Robotnik was actually demented enough to drill a square hole in his teeth to put in a transponder. OK, this is pretty wacko, but I can potentially buy this as Robotnik is quite insane, after all. Secondly, Knuckles actually leaving the Floating Island – OK, this I can potentially buy this as well. For one thing, his whole “devotion to the Master Emerald” thing hadn’t been established at this point (mainly because the Master Emerald itself hadn’t been established yet – but more on that in a future instalment). But Knuckles agreeing to brain surgery for Robotnik to implant a homing transceiver in his skull just in case Robotnik got captured?! Even if you ignore the massive leap in faith you’d have to make to even account for this as a potential possibility large enough to actually account for, would you accept brain surgery – for something that’s not even threatening your life before your skull is cracked open – from someone you have only just met and have no way of verifying his intentions other than “oh, he seems a nice guy, he says so himself”?! Dear christ Knuckles, this is a new level of gullibility, even for you! One final point – which, while still off, pales to the last one – the prison door has an opening in the bottom just the right size to pass the box of emeralds through – rather convenient. Robotnik releases Porker, and he & Knuckles climb off down the tunnel Knuckles made coming in, with Sonic warning Knuckles as they leave not to trust Robotnik – “he doesn’t care about you, he just wants the Chaos Emeralds”. Knuckles for his part ignores them, as they block off the tunnel – but Sonic isn’t beaten yet, and runs off upstairs.

Kintobor has found Robotnik and Knuckles as they made their escape – it seems Knuckles came down in a large egg pod capsule, which the two are now boarding with their stolen loot. Sonic & Tails make a dash for the Tornado – now with added jet booster, presumably Tails added it back on after the beating the plane took from carry Robotnik’s lardy arse down from the Floating Island last time. All you can say is be thankful they weren’t ascending rather than descending, eh? On board the pod, Robotnik grins with glee – he finally has his hands on the Chaos Emeralds! Knuckles cautiously points out that he’s the one keeping them, to which after a moment’s hesitation, Robotnik agrees; saying he is as keen as Knuckles to see them returned to their rightful Floating Island home again. Knuckles seems satisfied with this answer – for the moment, anyway – as he turns to point out the incoming Tornado beating down on the craft.

One neat bounce later, the eggpod is crashing in a spiral downwards – and rather conveniently smacks right onto the edge of the Floating Island. Sonic remarks that he should have guessed that that was where they were heading to – yes, Sonic, you should. Didn’t they just say as much back in the prison cell? The pair make a landing and move in close to the remains of the eggpod, as Tails asks Sonic if he thinks they survived the fall – Sonic for his part warns the fox to hold on a moment, as he just saw something move…

Robotnik’s derp face in this panel is hilarious, incidentally. But oh, boy. Looks like we’re in for one hell of a fight - next issue! (Cue cries of disappointment from the entire 1994 readership)

–

The next issue – and the conclusion to this direct story chain – begins right where the last one left off, with Knuckles bursting out of the eggpod lunging towards Sonic, who once again tells Knuckles that the bad guy is Robotnik, not him.

To my knowledge, this is the only time that the split-second Shield has gotten any sort of explanation as to how it actually works, even if Sonic’s explanation of there being “nothing to it if you’re a genius” leaves a lot to be desired. Sonic then does a Sonic Spin Attack into Knuckles, sending the echidna flying. Sonic then proceeds to beat the crap out of Knuckles by running around him in a circle and punching him in the skull & legs (He’s seemingly gotten a lot weaker since their last bout. Must be the brain implant going haywire). The hedgehog remarks that Knuckles simply doesn’t stand a chance against his speed, which Knuckles for his part says that one day they’ll have to find that out. However, at this point, getting the Emeralds out of the blue one’s hands is a much more higher priority.

It was very handy (you’re fired – Ed) that Tails is here to spot the enormous mitts that Knuckles has somehow summoned with a switch – makes you wonder what other oddball things are in the ground on this island. Do they have an owner, or are they more like Thing? Regardless, one grabs Sonic and starts squeezing him, while the other one proceeds to… do pretty much nothing. While Sonic & Tails are distracted, Knuckles guides Robotnik over to a Zoom Tube that will take them directly to their final destination, and warns him to keep a tight hold of the Chaos Emeralds – to which Robotnik remarks that he most certainly will. Meanwhile, back with our heroes:

Tails struggles with all of his might, but he just can’t get the grip of the one hand that’s bothering to do anything (seriously, what’s the other one doing? Drumming it’s fingers on the floor? Tails is flying around loose!) off Sonic, who struggles to keep breathing. Tails simply isn’t strong enough to save his hero, who is promptly crushed to death.

Oh, who are we kidding, it’s just Fleetway Sonic being an enormous prick to his friends again.

So, it seems that Sonic faking his death in front of Tails wasn’t just to unnecessarily traumatise him, but also had another purpose; as Sonic reveals to Tails that he let Knuckles & Robotnik think that he was hedgehog pulp so that he could find out what Robotnik was really up to – now Knuckles thinks he’s done for, the two have a chance of catching them off guard – and they enter the Zoom Tube. Meanwhile, Knuckles & Robotnik have already arrived at their final stop, the Temple of Chaos (think a prototype Hidden Palace Zone – no, not that one), where 6 Chaos Emeralds are floating in a pillar of light above a small mound. Knuckles remarks that legend says that long ago the six Chaos Emeralds were split into 12, to which Robotnik says that finally they are all back where they belong, with Knuckles pointing out that it’s all thanks to the Doctor; though he does point out that due to the 7th Emerald (the Grey one) being still missing, he has no way of controlling the existing 12. However, Robotnik has thought of this as well (industrious little tyke, isn’t he?), and has a little box to do the Grey’s job.

The emeralds being united once again by the box, we’re now finally back to where we were at the start of this whole story & there being 6 emeralds again. However, now he is in possession of 6 fully powered up Emeralds, it is finally time for Robotnik to show his true colours – and raising his arms high into the air, he begins to absorb their energy, to Knuckles’ panicked objections.

Dear god he’s fat, isn’t he? Sonic and Tails pop out of the Zoom Tube, but it appears they’re far too late to do anything, as Knuckles has blindly helped Robotnik reach his end goal of being invincible from the Chaos energy the gemstones give off. Sonic remarking his plan may have gone a “little wrong” is somewhat of an understatement, here. Gaining this new power has given Robotnik other abilities too – he fires an energy beam from his fingertip, turning Tails into glass!

Nice catch, Sonic. Also nice to know you care more about getting bad luck for 7 years than, you know, killing Tails. Before Sonic can make any more jokes in dubious taste however, it seems that Knuckles has been hiding something of his own all along:

Knuckles’ fortuitous hiding away of the Grey Emerald is the one thing Robotnik is vulnerable to, as Knuckles points out – “he who holds the Grey Emerald has total control over the others.” Even if it is quite clearly only half of the Emerald he’s holding (it’s just evidently that badarse). Robotnik winces in pain as the energy is sucked out of him – and he disappears in a cloud of smoke. Tails (now restored from his crystalline form) and Sonic wander over towards Knuckles, asking what happened to Robotnik. Knuckles says that he didn’t destroy him, but merely sent him back down to the surface of Mobius – after removing all of his powers, naturally. Tails then asks how Knuckles knew Robotnik was lying – Knuckles says he didn’t, but that if Robotnik thought he had the power of the Emeralds, the truth would come out. With Knuckles having the Grey in reserve, he would be able to come out on top regardless. Sonic offers Knuckles a position with the Freedom Fighters against Robotnik’s rule, but the echidna turns him down, saying that the war is no concern of his: and there’s something else, too.

So, wait, is he a space alien left on the Island by his people? Did the rest of his people live on the Island initially and then get abducted? If so, how was he spared? Or did the ancient Echidnas somehow manage to get space travel while the rest of Mobius was at such a low level that they were able to be enslaved by the first random human that came along that crashed onto their planet, and built a load of robots? Absolutely none of these questions are answered by Knuckles, so we’ll have to leave it at pondering for now. Sonic and Tails walk off towards the Tornado, leaving Knuckles to pose around the newly-whole Emeralds. Tails says that he feels sorry for Knuckles having to live all alone on the Island, and while Sonic knows what he means, he gets the feeling that they haven’t seen the last of him.

How right he is.

–

And that’s the start of the Sonic 3 & Knuckles era in StC, more or less! A few creative liberties here and there but still fairly game faithful – and the best is yet to come! Misadventures in Icecap, Knuckles meeting a certain copyright-skirting plumber trio, and an actual Genocide City Zone – all to come; along with the Death Egg’s launch, and Sonic & Robotnik’s final fight for the Master Emerald!

Until then, I’ll leave you with this little teaser, and remember that it’s:

See you next time!

—-

Looking for the previous 2 parts? They’re right here:

How Fleetway Played The Games, Part One: Of Flying Battleships and Space Eggs
How Fleetway Played The Games, Part 2: Of Time Stones and Shrink Lasers

And if you’re after more of an American flavour, don’t forget to check out David The Lurker’s guide to how the US Archie comic did things over the pond:

How Archie Played the Games, Part One: Of Pinball and Echidnas
How Archie Played the Games, Part Two: Of Floating Islands
How Archie Played The Games, Part Three: Of Pink And Metal Hedgehogs
How Archie Played The Games, Part Four: Of Walkers and Snipers
How Archie Played The Games, Part Five: Of Rodents and Giants

The Sonic Genesis arc of Archie’s comic book series is nearing its close as Sonic and the Freedom Fighters are gunning toward a showdown with Dr. Eggman aboard his Death Egg. For fans of the comic book, this has no doubt been an exciting ride that Ian Flynn has been putting readers through. To make it even more special, those that are attending New York Comic Con can get a special convention exclusive cover for Sonic #229, as well as a Mega Man: Powered Up inspired cover for Mega Man #6.

The exclusive cover, seen below courtesy of IGN Comics, is a line art version of the normal cover featuring Super Sonic. For those interested in attending, New York Comic Con lasts from Oct. 13 to Oct. 17. Who knows, you might be able to make the cover more special by getting the signatures of cover artist Patrick “Spaz” Spaziante and Flynn himself!

Sonic the Hedgehog has always been about the games. Say what you will about the comics, or the TV shows, or novels that feature tractors, but at the end of the day, Sonic the Hedgehog is a gaming franchise. While everything else can keep the icon in the public’s mind, SEGA has always been more concerned about how many units they can move than the plot of Sonic Underground. After all, that’s where they make their money. That’s where the state of the franchise is derived. That is what so many blogs and news sites focus on when they think “Sonic the Hedgehog.”

With Sonic’s 20th anniversary, there is going to be plenty of reflection on the franchise. I predict no less than fifty blog sites will put up “the top ten best Sonic games ever” that will feature the genesis games, Sonic CD, and Sonic Adventure in the top spots, with maybe the random “Sonic Advance” or “Sonic Triple Trouble” to break up the monotony. I know that, at least for me, I’m not going to sully the front page of this fine establishment with such a list. That is why I turn my attention for the moment on something that I am far too familiar with…the Archie Sonic the Hedgehog series.

No, this is not going to be a top ten list of “best single issues/arcs/anything.” Like I said in the beginning, the Sonic franchise has always been about gaming first, everything else second. So it’s only natural that, at some point, SEGA would tell whomever was making their promotional material to include adaptations for the game they were currently pushing. Depending on which side of the Atlantic you were on, you either got the U.K’s Sonic the Comic (whose loyal readership will swear up and down is the greatest thing ever) or you got the aforementioned Archie series. And the only real reason I’m starting with Archie is because of where I grew up. But hey, can you ever have enough Ken Penders jokes?

The first game adaptation Archie tackled was early on in the life of the series. After the initial four issue mini-series, Archie greenlit the regularly published comic, which was not much more than Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog-esque tales using the cast and settings of the Saturday morning show. Scratch and Grounder were there and Sonic was being ridiculous, but the Knothole Freedom Fighters were fighting the good fight back in the Great Forest. It was a comic looking for its voice, and still hadn’t found it when its first game adaptation happened in issue six.

“The Spin Doctor,” written by Michael Gallagher with art by Dave Manak, was a direct adaption of the latest game in the Sonic series at that time, Sonic Spinball. That is, as direct as one can get in eight pages. The story starts off with Sonic and the rest of the Freedom Fighters (including pink-hued Princess Sally) running towards one of Dr. Robotnik‘s latest robot factories…only to find that it’s been shut down. The only clue as to what happened? A letter direct from the evil dictator of the planet, triumphing moving his factories into the volcanic Mt. Mobius, and that no one can stop him! Expectantly, Sonic rushes off to save the day…because if he didn’t, there wouldn’t be much of a story. It’s pretty convenient that his quick departure is alone, abandoning the rest of the Freedom Fighters so he can face Robotnik. I suppose it’s because Spinball only has you control Sonic, so they were staying true to the game!

Oh wait, Sonic Spinball is the only game that used any western influence (aside from Mean Bean Machine) and actually had all the Freedom Fighters in cameo roles. Including that version of Sally. But I guess having them kidnapped and being guarded by Scratch would have necessitated at least two more pages. Oh well. So Sonic arrives at the mountain (which he only knows exists because Robotnik told him) and tries to figure out a way past the moat of lava surrounding it. The perfect chance for Robotnik to strike!…by using a flipper and knocking Sonic all over the place. Pinball physics, anyone? It doesn’t take long for Sonic to realize the strange rails leading into the volcano are those from pinball machines, meant to shoot forward the ball and have it be played through. How very nice of the doctor to also install this into his fortress. Yes, I know it’s meant to be a trap and all that. But he could try and make it a little less obvious.

Over the next few pages, Sonic goes through the motions, showing the readers what they might find in the game. We get the Toxic Caves (with pink toxic waste…this isn’t Sonic the Hedgehog 2, you silly colorist!) with the two main robots in tow: Rexxon (the lizard that wants to eat you at the bottom) and Scorpious (the weird Eggman-looking thing that wants to eat you at the top) each taunting the hedgehog. Wait, not even Scorpious is Rexxon’s friend? How sad. Not like either of them have long to live. Then we go higher to Lava Powerhouse which Sonic uses a minecart to get to (oh god…wait that was only in Toxic Caves you’re trying to trick me comic) and runs into “Hip” and “Hop,” the two kangaroos who do absolutely nothing. Great work guys! Then he goes even higher to The Machine, where Sonic doesn’t do much of anything himself. He sees a group of Mobiuns about to be robotocized and claims he is going to free them. And what better way to set them free than face off against Dr. Robotnik. Wait, shouldn’t he try breaking that machine first? Y’know, in case he loses or something?

So Sonic jumps into “The Showdown,” only to find a television broadcasting Dr. Robotnik’s face. Instead of a climatic battle (or an episode of The Robotnik Show) the evil doctor catapults Sonic out of the fortress, sending him flying through the sky. It’s only because of Tails that Sonic is saved, and the blue hedgehog says to himself that he’s sure this isn’t over…

…but it is. There is an editor’s note asking people to write in if they want to see more of Sonic Spinball, but this is the only time in the series this mountain is seen. And Sonic doesn’t even win here! He doesn’t fight Robotnik, destroy the mountain, or even free the animals that were trapped. The only two that do escape, Hip and Hop, do it on their own accord, not Sonic’s. For all we know, Robontik’s plan to robotocize the entire planet was well underway! I mean, reading any issue beyond this shows otherwise, but…it would be forgivable if they had the intention of doing something beyond this. The rest of the issue is dedicated to a Sonic version of “A Christmas Carol,” which as I recall was not featured in the game at all (unless it was in a beta we don’t have). Are we supposed to assume that this is only a prequel to the game, and that the events in the cartridge are Sonic’s second foray into the mountain? Even though the ending leaves a lot to be desired, and the pacing has severe issues (as many stories in this era of the comic has) there is still a weird charm to it. Maybe because the staff behind it didn’t think the comic was going to last more than twenty issues at most. Heck, Ken Penders didn’t think the comic was going to live longer than issue 50. That’s why it was so crazy around that time!

Oh, and the cover showed Sonic wearing a tie. So it has that going for it.

Even though that was the first official adaptation in the comic, most people have forgotten about it because it really is just “another Sonic story from the comics.” It has become foggy, and likely merged together with Spinball‘s other adaptations in Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog and the Saturday morning series. SEGA really wanted to whore out that game. And it wasn’t even the best of the year! Why didn’t they whore out Sonic CD like that? It would have been awesome to see an animated Little Planet in either show…those animated intros to the game were such teases…

No, when people think of adaptations in the Archie comics of the games, the first they think of is the Sonic the Hedgehog 3 story in issue thirteen, “This Island Hedgehog.” Once again drawn by Dave Manak, this is the first adaptation done by Ken Penders, the man who would steer the comic for the next hundred and fifty issues. However, Ken is only the co-writer, sharing duties with Mike Kanterovich, so it is a complete mystery which line is credited to who. The story starts with Sonic and Tails spotting a floating island, just out of nowhere. No reason given as to how they found it, or if they’re on a mission, just that it exists and is in their way. So Tails asks Sonic what he thinks is making the island float, and only one item comes to mind – a Chaos Emerald. Hey, that’s something from the games! Maybe this won’t be so bad after all! And there’s Knuckles‘ fist foreshadowing the introduction of the character, talking about rolling out the unwelcome mat…

…that subsequently knocks the plane out of the air. Oh. That’s…something special. Is it too picky of me to point out the fact the biplane which looks like the Tornado isn’t the right color? But at least Tails was flying it and not, say, Rotor or Antoine. I can give credit to the creative team for keeping out the Freedom Fighters at this point! So after Sonic and Tails exchange some punworthy dialogue, they encounter the very first sub-boss from Sonic 3, who shoots fire at our dynamic duo. “Holy 16-Bit Graphics!” Sonic gets covered by an energy shield unexpectedly, protecting him from being burnt to a crisp. But, knowing they’re not out of the woods (or jungle) yet, they jump into a nearby body of water, making a comment that I’m sure the Comics Code Authority wouldn’t have liked only a couple decades prior.

Sonic laments the fading of his new shield while him and his two-tailed friend bob about in the Hydrocity Zone, in which the comic demands we help out our heroes by pushing the buttons on my Sega Genesis. Hey, wait a minute! How am I to plug that into the comic?! I love how the comic then goes to insult me for not being quick enough…hey, maybe if those text boxes were smart, they’d tell Sonic how to reactivate that shield of his. It was in the manual, after all!

After being unable to scale the zone successfully, Sonic and Tails pass out, only to reawaken at the end of part one, tied up staring directly at the visage of Knuckles the Echidna, the guardian of the Floating Island and the Chaos Emerald that keeps it afloat. Wait, just one?

As part two begins, we see that (quite expectantly) Dr. Robotnik and his nephew Snively are the ones behind the encounter, Robotnik having tricked the guardian into thinking Sonic the Hedgehog is the enemy here. Watching through a hidden camera, the ruler of Mobius stares on as Sonic and Knuckles face off, and is baffled as Knuckles lets the two go, giving them “ten minutes” to get off the island and never return, else he’ll give them a “knuckles sandwich.” Not sure what that would taste like, but hey. After Knuckles assures Robotnik he’ll give Sonic and Tails “the business” if they don’t leave the island (oh god what) Robotnik quickly forgets his troubles when Crabmeat appears, wielding the Chaos Emerald and giving it to Robotnik. Guess it just got real.

Meanwhile, Sonic and Tails confirm to the readers they’re not about to run off, with Tails asking how they’re going to prove their innocence. Sonic replies that they won’t need to, and Robotnik will likely reveal his true colors soon enough. As if on cue (hey, we only have twelve pages here) Knuckles sees Sonic and Tails, and decides to cut them off to where he keeps the Chaos Emerald, as they’re heading in the general direction. And since Robotnik already has it? Knuckles finds it’s gone. Not the best hiding place, huh? Maybe next time don’t just leave it out in the open sitting on a random rock. When the duo arrive, Knuckles realizes he’s been played for a sap, and that Robotnik is the real villain.

Robotnik, in the interim, uses the emerald to power up his ship, preparing to leave the island. Of course, he wants to keep the emerald, but is unable to keep ahold as Sonic zips by, snatching it away. Knuckles reveals he knows of the deception, and the three defeat Robotnik’s SWATbots in a single panel. Now those are the kind of battles I love. Quickly, the villains escape, and Knuckles shows that for some reason he collected the remains of the fake-Tornado, just so Sonic could conveniently put it back together. And with that, Sonic and Tails fly off, leaving Knuckles alone with the feeling that he hasn’t seen the last of these two. And has history has shown, those suspicions proved to be correct…

While it would be easy to be overly critical of the story, I find myself unable to do so. Maybe it’s because of the goggles of nostalgia, but if you look at it in the context of the other stories being published at the time (or even the other Sonic story in the comic) it comes off as something better than the rest. Sure, you have plenty of pop culture references which don’t make sense when Sonic’s world started turning into the more serious adventures of the issues in the 30′s and beyond, but how often do you have a Crabmeat quote the 60′s Batman television show? And hey, maybe one day Ian Flynn will explain what “Gotham City” is like on Angel Island. Even the fourth-wall breaking at the beginning of the second page showcases an innocence in the comic that would not last for much longer. In some ways, Knuckles was the herald of the “beginning of the end” of this carefree, Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog styled storytelling. It would have been nice if the story was fleshed out, and took up the whole issue instead of only half, though. I mean, Sonic the Comic‘s adaptation took up multiple issues, and flowed pretty well into the Sonic & Knuckles adaptation they did…

…but I’m getting off topic there. In the end, it is a fun little story. Even if it is pretty far removed from the game. The first level? You see that Angel Island is actually in the water, not floating as the name suggests. And it is a little odd that the writers completely ignore the Death Egg in any capacity…though they did revisit the concept later on. But I’ll get to that when I get to that. In another column. And it would have been nice to see the other areas of the island, like the fan favorite Ice Cap Zone, or even have the story be a cliffhanger. I can’t totally fault the creative team on that one, though. I’m certain SEGA didn’t exactly tell them Sonic the Hedgehog 3 was only the first half of the game, and that Sonic & Knuckles would pick up directly after Launch Base. Another zone that would have been nice to see in the comics. Actually, there was a lot in that game that would have been nice to see. Then again, this wasn’t the last time we saw Knuckles, the island, or its many locales.

One thing I didn’t mention is that the story was dedicated to Jack Kirby, considered one of the greatest comic artists and writers of all time, working side-by-side with Stan Lee to help build the original Marvel line of comics. By dedicating this story to that man, the creative team put themselves out on a limb, telling the world that, hopefully, one day, they would be able to master the craft of comic books in a way that came so easily to Jack Kirby. And though Ken Penders strove for that sort of greatness with his Knuckles’ line, he never quite made it. Then again, how many comic book creators today can say that they have?

So there you have it, the first two Sonic game adaptations that were part of the line. So what was to come next? Quite a few, believe you me. Floating islands, metallic hedgehogs, groups that were chaotic, pistol-wielding weasels…the Archie Sonicverse would never be the same. So stay tuned as we continue this magical journey down memory lane and reminisce about a kid’s comic book that has lasted eighteen years.

Wait a minute, the Sonic the Hedgehog 3 adaptation didn’t have one barrel in it! Maybe that’s why Ice Cap was missing…

This week we decided to look are a pretty wide range of interests in the Sonic community. In fact we hit the ground running with the discussion of Rotor’s alleged sexuality and from there, get into a pretty deep discussion about the Sonic Archie universe. We even take a look into the mind and character of Dr. Robotnik AKA Eggman to find out he might not be quite so evil and instead just a jackass.

We also talk over TSSZ News and the man who runs it, Tristan. And we say things like (EDIT – Inflamatory – T). But after all the drama, we go ahead and discuss one of the more positive aspects of the community which is the hacks! In particular, we talk about Sonic Boom and how much we both love it hate its difficulty. After that, we give Sonic 2 LD a bit of a spotlight which is a pretty cool project by Doc Eggfan.

Be sure to stick around for the next episode (within the year) where we’ll talk about Sonic 2 HD and Tom Payne’s art scans from Sonic 2′s production. And who knows what else!