Fudge the Black Eyed Peas. Sonic Retro is the place to be for your Super Bowl halftime entertainment. Here’s a trio of stupid videos (I guesstimated when halftime would start when I set this to publish earlier, so if it’s early/late, uh… suck it).
The Sonic 19th Birthday Contest was the best contest ever because people got on YouTube and made asses out of themselves for a chance to go to Japan and live out their weeaboo fantasies. This bro got pumped up one Naturday and beat the shit out of his friends dressed as Sonic, nullifying the muscles he worked so hard to achieve. How did this guy’s other bro friends not punk him out in this video? TFM.
We live in a time where voice acting determines whether or not a Sonic game is good. If you complain about gameplay, you’re an a-hole d-bag and deserve to get written up in a magazine by a blubbering vagina. Let’s talk about voice acting for 2,000 pages but HEY SHUT UP OVER THERE WITH YOUR GAMEPLAY TALK VOICE ACTING IS IMPORTANT IN A VIDEO GAME. I bet voice acting can breathe new life into Sonic 2, right? MAN THIS GAME IS SO AMAZING NOW! WORD UP, VEX.
A BOSS APPEARS
There’s your Super Bowl halftime show. If you aren’t drunk by now, you a) don’t like sports b) are British c) are 14 years old. Fix that.
You may begin complaining about how pointless this post is in the comments now.