Humor, Miscellaneous

Real Talk

[audio:http://www.sonicretro.org/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/r_kelly-real_talk.mp3]

So we were hangin’ out in the Sykpe when Skyler came in.  He was talkin’ ’bout that one time he and Ken Balough met and we laughed.

Real talk.

Then he said, “Hey, man, who’s got the worst physics – Sonic 4 or Sonic Genesis” and we all said, “Oh f*ck” all at the same time.

Real talk.

And then he said, “WERE THERE ANY OTHER GUYS THERE… WERE THERE ANY OTHER GUYS THERE” and then we were like “what?”

Real talk.

Tweaker then said, “That’s a good question.  We should make a poll and put it on the front page and ask everybody what they think.”

Real talk.


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54 Comments

  • Reply

    How was I supposed to know there were those other bad sonic games packed into the club, real talk

    No, listen to what I’ve got to say. I’ve been with you for nineteen years and you still listenin’ to that Iizuka, real talk

  • Reply

    Iizuka came in and he said we need to have aliens in this next Sonic game, real talk.
    Then everybody said there’s aliens in every modern Sonic game why do you keep doing that, real talk.

  • Reply

    Give it up. Good god, guys. The physics suck. We get it. MOVE ON. 

    • Reply

      Someone doesn’t get the point but I guess that’s what happens when you’re kinda ignorant, real talk.

    • Reply

      Looks like someone doesn’t get the joke at all. Real talk.

    • Reply

      WHY YOU GOT THAT STICK IN YA ASS. I SAID WHY YOU GOT THAT STICK IN YA ASS. …Real talk.

    • Reply

      And then Michael Lindeen fired up Sonic 4 and realized that the physics suck more with each day, all because it was made by a team that only cared about getting something out of the door to get money to roll around in while being naked with Asian hookers at the club, real talk.
      And then Naka drove by with his Ferrari and picked up all the bitches at the club and said “you never saw me do cocaine off the cover of a copy of Sonic the Hedgehog 2, real talk.

    • Reply

      smh at the Internet, real talk.

    • Reply

      On the on real tip, Sonic Genesis?

      • Reply

        You forgot to say real talk. Real talk.

        • Reply

          Real talk.

    • Reply

      I loled so hard at everything above, real talk.

  • Reply

    But then ila was like didn’t he ask that question and not skyler and Brad doesn’t know what he’s talking about and really should fix that but I guess it probably doesn’t really matter that much anyway and ila is an owl, real talk.

  • Reply

    The joke went way over Michael Lindeen’s head, real talk.
    Then everyone in started chewing his ass out, real talk.

  • Reply

    I ain’t a physicist, real talk.
    But even whining about fake “momentum-based gameplay” compared to a broken game is some c’mon son nonsense, real talk.

    • Reply

      thatsthejoke.rltlk

      • Reply

        Sonic Retro is full of morons who need it spelled out or else they’ll start saying dumb things on Twitter, real talk.

        • Reply

          Or they’ll just start saying dumb things everywhere because they don’t have a sense of humor and take Sonic too seriously and can never have fun day in and day out and it’s really obnoxious… real talk.

        • Reply

          Cubot: “AH GET IT!” Real talk.

  • Reply

    Then RubyEclipse gave Brad a glittery pink PSP, real talk.
    Then some nerds argued about how it was lavendar not pink even though nobody gives a shit, real talk.

    • Reply

      Why is SEGA playing favorites by giving a debatable PSP color to someone who works for Sonic Stadium and Sonic Retro when there are other sites there? When there are other sites there? When there are other sites there? Real talk.

      • Reply

        I fucking love this comment. Real talk.

    • Reply

      What Sonic needed was glittery pink eyes.
      Real talk.

  • Reply

    Honestly, Sonic Genesis fails by a hair due to shitty collision detection and even a dash of bad gap detection. Sonic 4 isn’t broken, just inferior. Sonic Genesis… was broken. Sonic 4: Episode I succeeds at its intended gameplay, it’s just that its intended gameplay was underwhelming to begin with. Sonic Genesis fails on its own terms. FYI, I know there’s a joke in here somewhere, but wherever “real talk” comes from, this is the first I’ve heard of it and I have no idea what I’m supposed to be laughing at. ^.^’

    • Reply

      How about you listen to the audio file that’s at the very top of the post. Real talk.

      • Reply

        I’m not exactly on an ideal machine for that sort of thing right now, unfortunately, as my computer had a seizure and died of Bluescreen the other day. …Uh, real talk.

  • Reply

    I can see this going both ways. Real Talk

  • Reply

    Real Talk… WORST. PHYSICS. EVER!!!

    • Reply

      You’re doing it wrong, real talk.

  • Reply

    Aww c’mon, give the guys some slack. Real talk.
    Except on Sonic Genesis. That will always suck. Real talk.

  • Reply

    Compared to Sonic Genesis, Sonic 4 is a masterpiece, real talk.

  • Reply

    So at first I was thinking sonic genesis clearly is the shitiest. Real talk.
    But then I saw, http://bit.ly/ab6Rb0. Real talk.
    Oh this is bad! REAL TALK!

  • Reply

    😐

    • Reply

      Real talk.

  • Reply

    I just downloaded Sonic genesis to try it out.
    good lord it’s terrible.

    • Reply

      Real talk?

    • Reply

      Real talk

  • Reply

    I saw Sonic Genesis one time on YouTube and they had Yakety Sax playing through the whole thing, real talk.

    Then I thought, “What the hell, SEGA? You got this unemployed nerd who did the same thing but better and on the same system, man. What’s wrong with you? WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?”

    WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?

    Real talk.

  • Reply

    Real talk.

  • Reply

    Even people from Holland are thinking that Sonic Genesis had and has some awful graphics, even in The Netherlands, even in The Netherlands, even in The Netherlands…. Real talk.

  • Reply

    Netherland is the place to be, real talk. Coffeeshops and trees, real talk.

  • Reply

    Yeah sorry, this poll is real shit. Everyone knows S1 GBA is ass in a basket, let alone it’s physics. Real Talk.

    Actually, that’s a good song now.

    • Reply

      The point of this post is not the poll and thanks for freaking out about it on Twitter. Real talk.

      • Reply

        Don’t take it the wrong way, I just have a big mouth, so no hard feelings here. =P I did enjoy the song though, thanks for that!

  • Reply

    I don’t understand this poll…

    Sonic 4 had great physics.

    • Reply

      Then leave. Real talk.

      • Reply

        I thought my comment was sarcastic enough,

        then mister “I hate everything” ruined it.

        • Reply

          It’s hard to understand sarcasm on the Internet especially when we had people post above us thinking that the poll was real and freaking out about it. Real talk.

        • Reply

          Real talk x 2

  • Reply

    I’d personally say may favourite was Sonic 2006.
    Real talk.
    In which other games you can go for a wall-walk?
    Real talk.

    • Reply

      sonic 4. Real talk.

  • Reply

    I loved sonic 4, real talk.

  • Reply

    Sonic 4 sucks, real talk

  • Reply

    ♪ And then the casual gamers all came in and looked at us all funny because of physics that don’t match up to the Genesis version. Callin up Milton to “start the car up, Sonic fans gone lost their muthafuckin minds”. Real talk ♪

    ♪ They just glad that people got to play a 2D sonic game on a console. Real talk.
    Maybe Dimps and Sonic Team got the message and will put the right physics in for Episode Twooooooo… Real talk? ♪♪

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